Balance life between today, pursuit of goals
Stress for Success
October 9, 2007

Balance: a state of equilibrium, equal distribution of weight, amount, etc. Seeking balance in your life is a cornerstone of stress management; such as don’t under- or over-exercise, if you’re too passive you’d be wise to become more assertive, etc.

Recently I’ve addressed an excellent book, “Finding Flow” by Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi, where the author encourages you to live your life by setting and working toward goals that stretch your skills. Following his advice can create a life of greater meaning and happiness. Creating “flow” activities also discourages your mind from ruminating on the negative.

But some people take this to the extreme, putting far too much energy into pursuing goals leading to a state of imbalance, focusing continually on the future while missing much of today. Like the hard-driving “successful” person who rides right into a beautiful sunset without even noticing it. Being goal-oriented is great but not to the exclusion of the here and now.

Others would say focusing on future goals is largely a waste of time because as Buddhism believes one’s reality is in the present moment; the here and now. To practitioners, focusing on the future means missing reality. Besides, working so tirelessly on goal attainment often doesn't bring you the satisfaction you’d hoped for anyway. Another benefit of living in the moment is that it facilitates mental and emotional balance because it means giving up your worries about the future and your regrets about the past.

But focusing exclusively on the here and now may not prepare you for the future.
The reality of living in our economic society, for example, requires knowing where your next paycheck is coming from to pay bills and that requires at least some level of planning for the future.

This is where balance comes in. Over-focusing on tomorrow means missing today; ask any parent who has over-focused on a career and missed out on kids growing up.
Whereas over-focusing on today may find someone in love with the spontaneous but forgetting important work deadlines or other commitments.

The trick is to seek balance. The more an imbalance pushes down one side of the scale the more you need to rectify it by doing something very unlike the cause to create a better equilibrium. Then watch your symptoms of imbalance begin to dissipate.

For example, you high-speeders racing into the future might want to balance your goal-focused tendencies by increasing your mindfulness of things you do daily like eating meals slowly and focusing your attention on the flavors, textures, and sensations of the food. Regular meditation would be great for you.

Or if you tend to mostly live in the moment scraping together your rent money, prepare a budget and figure out where your necessary income will come from. Set goals of how to adjust your income and expenses.

Balancing how much you focus on the present and the future allows you to enjoy the opportunities of the moment as well as plan for and secure your future.

Jacquelyn Ferguson, M. S., of InterAction Associates, is a trainer and a Stress Coach. E-mail her at www.jackieferguson.com with your questions or for information about her workshops on this and other topics and to invite her to speak to your organization.